Would You (And Should You) Date Someone Because of Money?

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    Should You Date Someone Because of Money?

    1. I never really thought about this. I supposed if I were single, I would be attracted to someone with money, not because of their income necessarily, but it showcases someone as successful, driven, and responsible, which are all traits I would value. But I don’t think I would date someone just because of their income. You are right…net worth is much more important. Great post!

    2. Lesa R says:

      I did not date my husband because of money. I found out that he had money after the fact. However, I can honestly say finances change, and all it took was for us to get married and my accident to make me unable to work. It put all the pressure on him. Then we had a surprise baby on top of all of that. However, we do love each other, and love and the bond between us is bigger than finances. Having the good money habits though for both of us has really made it easier to get back on track though!

    3. TJ says:

      I think when money in general becomes less of a taboo, “paying attention to money while dating” will also be less of a taboo.

      The problem with words like “dating for money” is it immediately brings to mind the stereotype of the 65 year old man trading in his long time wife for a broke 25 year old woman.

      I know that, for me, I’ve been so much less stressed about my own money when I’ve dated someone who was in a similar spot to me and prioritized saving and investing over say luxury goods or frequent drunken shenanigans. I don’t think that it’s necessarily being shallow or even “obsessed with money”, it’s just an indicator of financial lifestyle compatibility. Being compatible on the big stuff is a pretty good starting point to avoid ending up in arguments about the big stuff. But I’m not sure how one would really screen for that in a socially acceptable way, so I don’t.

      • Stefanie says:

        I think it just takes time. By the end of year one in a relationship, I generally have a good sense of my partners’ financial habits and if we’re aligned or not.

    4. My husband and I met fairly young into our twenties so I didn’t really have a chance to dabble in the dating scene much (and I didn’t know about personal finance stuff then). I think if I were in a different situation and dating now, I probably would “date for money” because I’m so into personal finance, it would be hard to not be attracted to someone who has similar financial priorities. At the same time, my husband and I are opposites when it comes to money (not spending but general desire to have money – he’s happier with less) and I think that has really benefited me greatly.

      • Stefanie says:

        It’s funny because my bf has always been my financial opposite too and I think it’s benefited both of us. I’ve loosened up and learned to enjoy my spending, whereas he’s become more of an aggressive saver and investor. I think that willingness to be open and malleable and align with one another is probably the MOST important thing.

    5. Best line I found is, “I don’t think you should date someone because of how much money they have” Money may give you happiness, but as per my experience money is not everything.

      Great post!

    6. Ria says:

      For me it’s not necessarily money that I am attracted to, but his ambition and drive. If he has a successful career, then that tells me he goes for what he wants and works hard, and that’s what is attractive to me.

      • Stefanie says:

        Absolutely. It’s hard to be with someone when you’re ambitious and they’re not. That ambition may not always manifest as money, but if the drive isn’t there, it’s tough.

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